One Month Later

Today marks one month ago from the incident we don't speak of...a little "The Village" pun for you. I'm still battle pain in my pelvic region each time I walk. But I would rather face the pain than just sit at home everyday. My exercise today included almost 4 hours of walking. Almost 2 this morning and another 2 this afternoon. Went to West Portal this morning after a long walk through the Forest Hill neighborhood of the city. If you live in the city, I highly recommend checking this area out. I am continually blown away by all the cool spots in this city that I am sure most people have never seen before. Then I stopped and got some coffee at Noah's Bagels in West Portal. Its been my little coffee stop recently on the way to SF State. They have free refills which is awesome. I got totally amped to the point where I was getting the jitters. Probably only eating a banana all morning didn't help either. But I was saving myself for brunch with Wendy in Mill Valley at Dipsea. It was super delicious. Went with a greek omelette, red potatoes and homemade biscuit. Wendy went for the salmon-avocado omelette but didn't feel too good. so I ate it for her =) I was feeling a little gluttonous this morning but it did count for two meals(breakfast and lunch) and I had walked a lot so stop judging! =) It was great catching up with her. We hadn't seen each other since May so lots of news to share between us. Lots of cyclists out in marin today. Definitely missed it, but I will be back shortly.

So Diana went for a 15min ride on her stationary bike at home. I'm super happy for her. So now she has 10 more minutes of riding than I do in the last month =) But I walked 4 hours today so that has to count for something right? I head back east to visit her this Wed. Very much looking forward to it. This will be my 4th trip in the last month. Pretty crazy stuff. We have big plans for 2008, so keep watching the blog as details will be unravelled in the coming weeks.

Time to eat now, so I bid you adieu and a safe and happy week ahead.

Adieu,
matthew

The Comeback Begins...

Yesterday, while visiting family in TN, I met with a neurosurgeon to get some additional guidance on my C7 situation. After leaving Westchester Medical Center without much to go on except, "you will be in the collar for 6-8 weeks." Basically, i get to now take a shower without a collar. Its pretty much Christmas in August for me. I waited until this morning before my early flight to take my first collar-less shower since July 25, just to build up the excitement. And yes it was truly amazing.

Also took the first step to what will now be referred to as my comeback story. On Sunday morning prior to taking my little sister to college, I rode my brother's road bike for 5 minutes around the driveway and up it. The driveway is no Col de Galibier but it does have a nice little pitch to it. I stayed in the saddle and rode "tempo" to the top of the driveway before going into the drops and descending the 400ft of driveway. I think I probably hit 32km/h! I got off and my pelvis hurt a lot but no pain, no gain right? So Sunday, Aug 19 is now known as the start of my comeback. 2010, Le Tour. Today is Tuesday or C-Day + 2.

The neurosurgeon said I will have to keep the collar on till my followup appointment on Sept 20. Based on his analysis the bones appear to set well together from my original images and should heal properly barring no trauma. I will get some additional images on this appointment and hopefully it will be a no collar day after that.

So this blog could be taking a new direction in the coming weeks. You will just have to keep reading to find out what surprises await. I do want to thank all the people who have kept their get-well thoughts coming. Its definitely helped.

Adieu,
Matthew

Hit by Truck Day +23

Perhaps I should go after a new topic besides getting hit by a truck. Its difficult to think of new material, just because every day I am reminded that my body is broken and that I cheated death. Yesterday, I was perusing my typical web haunts, Cyclingnews.com. There was a story about a pro italian woman rider. She was recently struck by a truck and suffered multiple fractures including vertebrae, pelvis, scapula, and clavicle. She is on the road to recovery. The end of her little bit struck me the most. She talked about getting hit and how it has changed her. She said getting hit seems almost like a right of passage in pro riding. The more I research cycling injuries, the more I realize how too often cyclists are injured by autos. Unfortunately, some don't get to make a comeback. I'm looking forward to my comeback and everyone on the road should watch out because its game on for me =)

Diana and I were speaking yesterday and we both mentioned how much the whole being hit by a truck thing has changed our outlook. Before I was taken out by a truck, I would hear about cyclists being injured. I would sympathize but thats about all I was capable of doing. Until you have faced death or near-death, you don't understand it. Everyone has but incredible supportive of us both, but one thing people can't give is an understanding of what its like to be climbing alpine cols one week and weeks later, getting excited about getting out of bed without help and walking across the room. Life is put into perspective real quick. As I continually will say, I think of this experience as a defining moment in my life. Since I awoke to consciousness on the side of the road, I have done my best at keeping it light and trying to laugh and joke as much as possible. I was probably the most sarcastic, joking patient the EMS ever had to backboard. Its definitely accelerated my healing evident in the fact that I am now walking without a limp about 95% of the time. This is a huge step considering I was using a crutch last Friday. I know my parents are going to be blown away by my recovery when I see them in a few hours. In no way is the pain gone, but its becoming more and more manageable each day. I think the majority of the pain in the pelvis now is due in fact to the tightness in the muscles and tissue that has suffered extreme atrophy and stiffness from keeping my leg stiff. It looks like I might need some physical therapy but hopefully I can work it out solo with my foam roller and stretching. If it wasn't for this oppressive neck collar, it would be quite difficult to know that I was run over by a truck 3 weeks ago.

Tomorrow I am taking my little sister Megan to college with my parents. She is part of the class of 2011 at University of Tennessee-Knoxville. Its unbelievable that she is going to college. I know she will do well like everyone else has done. No pressure on her though =) I consider my duties to be maybe lifting a little bit, as my shoulder is still weak, setting up the computer, and being supportive for my empty-nesting parents. Plus also giving Megan a hard time. Later today I am going to the wedding of Anna Soike. The Soike's are great family friends of ours. I want to wish Anna, her future husband Trey, and both families a great day.

Now here are some ramblings I have. For those of you that don't know, I run a community sailing program for San Francisco State University. It supports my cycling habit. I like to think that I am responsible for teaching kids in San Francisco how to sail. Anytime you are working with kids, you get good remarks and attitudes from parents and then sometimes you get bad ones. This past week seemed to be filled with bad ones. Monday, a parent pulled her kid out because the kids weren't her age, she was 10 most of the kids were 12. What she didn't know was there was another 10yr old who was sick on day 1. I am sure the kid was a little overwhelmed on the first day, but I know they would have enjoyed it had they stuck with it. So parents, sometimes its okay to force your kids to do something even if the kid resists. If this wasn't the case, you would probably see only enrollment in school at 20%. Now this is not to say that you should live vicariously through your kids and continually force them into stuff they dislike but its okay to be a hawk at times rather than a lame duck. Yesterday, Friday, I received another call from "concerned" parent. After listening to the 5minute voicemail, I called the parent to discuss. First off, never leave a 5 minute voicemail. It annoys me and most others to no end and doesn't do much to help your story or concern. It frustrates me to no end because its typically a message that can be said in 30seconds but is repeated 6x. I'm not stupid, I understood it the first time. Okay, so when I called this woman, she went into her spill again. I ended up holding the phone away from my ear for quite a bit. Mainly out of spite. Her grievances...well, her daughter hurt her back while carrying a boat on Thursday. For her injury, I am sorry. I would never want to see a kid get hurt or put a kid in a position where they might get injured. I had spoken with my instructor the day prior regarding this girl and he indicated that no one got hurt and noted how little work this girl did in class. I taught several of these girls at my earlier spring break camp. They were all great girls but I was definitely aware that a few of them were not too eager at participating in the loading and unloading of boats and gear. For me, carrying boats, setting boats up is just as important as learning how to make the boat move. Its all about teaching responsibility both on the water and off because when you are on the water, you can easily find yourself without assistance. You must be prepared to handle all situations as if no one would ever come to your rescue. I think that is one of the greatest things about learning how to sail. Kids are babied enough in school and extra-curriculars. Now sailing is not perfect but it does go well beyond tball or flag football or dance. Not to discount those activities. Now that I have given my feelings, here is my grievance...

The parent stressed how her daughter is not that strong, "she doesn't have a lot of muscle, she is not athletic. She is an intellectual, a musician, a singer." Okay, so this woman is essentially excusing her daughter from all physical things because she is not athletic. HOW IN THE WORLD COULD A PARENT OR ANYONE DEFINE WHAT 14YR OLD GIRL IS OR NOT IS? This is the same naive attitude that I hear in cycling..."ohh, I didn't do well in the criterium, b/c I'm not a sprinter, or I won't do a road race because I am a sprinter and can't climb." Why is everyone so quick to try to define themselves what they are or not, and what good is this woman doing to her daughter by defining her and creating an attitude for her daughter what her capabilities are and aren't at 14!? Then she had the audacity to say that she new there were plenty of strong boys in the class that should be doing the heavy lifting. Have we not made an improvement in the gender war? I know that we all have our limitations but sailing for me has always been an arena where boys and girls can compete and enjoy sailing equally. Case in point, if you look at the recent 29er European championships or the Youth Worlds in 29ers, both of these events were won by two american girls who beat a lot of very competitive girl and boy boats. Just because she is a girl should never be her get out of lifting boats or doing physical work card. If her mother was smart, she would encourage her daughter to take up some form of athletics or atleast encourage her to remain physically active. I am sure Harvard or Stanford would much rather have her if you she had some physical fitness. Yes, that is a swipe at Harvard and Stanford =) Maybe I am just hoping for too much from parents. I'm no parent, but I have taught enough kids in sailing to know a little bit about things that work and don't work. Despite these two bad, parent events this week, the program has experienced a lot of praise from parents and kids alike. Seeing the kids laugh and actually learn something and take responsibility is the most satisfying part in this world were kids grow up with this feeling of entitlement. Atleast one person thinks I have some good insight as I was quoted in a child-rearing book a few years ago. The book is called, Sign Me Up. I am on 4 pages so I think I'm kind of a big deal. Now if I could just get the college team I coach to take more pride and responsibility in their work then I will be happy. So if anyone from CMA Sailing is reading this, I'm talking directly to you =) So see you in a few weeks and I hope you are ready for year 3.

Adieu,
Matthew

My Return as Human Being

Yesterday was a pretty big day for me. I noticed I started walking about 70% of the day without a noticable limp. I'm pretty proud of myself. Also, when I was laying in bed trying to wake myself up at 6:20am, I instinctively put my left hand behind my head without any pain whatsoever. It took me a few seconds to realize what I was doing and but quite exciting. The docs said it would be 3 weeks for the scapula and pelvis to heal. I think the bones are probably healed or nearly healed but everything is really tight which is probably causing the prolonged pain. My IT Band is wicked tight so I will have to put some major time on the roller. It was pretty painful to walk this morning so hopefully it just needs to get stretched out some. Perhaps some PT.

Laying in bed last night I started to flex my legs and noticed I had lost quite a bit of muscle in the quads. I know I will get it back but frustrating to know all the work I did has now beginning to waste away. Should be more motivation for me to get back to an even higher level. Maybe this is like a whole blessing in disguise. All the great champions had to make a comeback from some form of injury, illness, or setback. So, perhaps this is the time that I will really shine now that I am making my comeback. I read that Henk Vogels, of Toyota United Pro Cycling Team, had a serious crash in 2003 in which he fractured his C7 as well. It took him a year to get back but he is back and riding professionally. Definitely encouraged by this. From what everyone is saying, I am healing very quickly and look better every day. Rome wasn't built in a day, so I can't expect to be Post-Vaujany shape but Shawn and I are going to work up a tough fall program that will get in me primo shape for the early spring season which I hope to get the final points needed to upgrade to Cat 2. Also planning on a longer European program next year. So if anyone knows of any French amatuer teams, I would greatly appreciate the contact information. What will these teams get? Well, a hard-toothed american boy that will suffer on the front all day.

Monday I meet with a neurosurgeon for a followup. I'm hoping he will say that things are improving well, and I can take the collar off atleast to take a shower. I don't expect to get the collar off till mid september but a little brief time out of it to take a shower would be nice. My little sister Megan is moving into her dorm room on Sunday. I'm going to help her move in as best I can. Kind of monumental for my family as she is the last one to leave the nest and I was the first.

Adieu,
Mathieux

Back in SF

I am back at "home" now in San Francisco, just 10 days after I originally planned to return, what? Haven't you heard about all the delays at airports lately? Being the stubborn guy that I am, I decided to take BART from SFO to the SFSU campus. So I shlepped my bag around which was probably about 35lbs around the airport, on BART and to campus. I did crack and paid for a 1.5mi cab ride from the Daly City BART station to campus which was nearly $8.00. The free shuttle to campus was running late. I managed to get a little work done on campus. Nettie was awesome and gave me a ride back home but not before giving me some homemade grilled vegi pasta which was pretty much the bomb!

On Saturday, i met my friend Christina for a nice late morning breakfast at Crepes on Cole in the Cole Valley neighborhood. Pelvis was pretty sore but it was nice to walk around and get out of the house for a little bit. Then Christina totally surprised me with some great new literature, a book of movie quotes from Napoleon Dynamite. It was pretty awesome.

I have been sleeping much better since getting back. The temperatures are much cooler here which has been such a relief from the heat in TN. Spent most of the afternoon today at my cycling team's picnic on Crissy Field. Great to see everyone. I think I told the story of getting hit by a truck like 30times. Unfortunately my neck bling says, "look at me and ask me what happened." Seeing all the people on bikes here in the city has made me jealous that i can't be out riding, but its also made me extremely cautious. I'm sure i will get more adjusted and not think to much about it, but the reality of getting run over by a truck is slowly sitting in which is causing me to think more about the severity of my injuries. I'm still super motivated to go ride and train. Diana is healing well. She is getting around more on her feet but is getting eager to get out of the house which i completely understand. She wont' be down too long.

Enjoy the start of your week, and remember to keep it real. Hope to get some new recipes out to you this week. Right now my dinners consist of salads. Hope to break out some new stuff this week.

Adieu,
Matthew

Two weeks of "recovery"

So today marks the two-week anniversary of being plowed over by a truck. I say that because, we didn't wreck our bikes or were involved in an "accident." We were taken out by a truck which to this moment makes me still wonder how I am still here today because you don't get hit by a truck at 40-50mph and live to tell about it, let alone write a blog about it. I was definitely being watched over by something higher. They always say things happen for a reason. Its difficult to understand why Diana and I were struck by this tragedy, however, its the difficult moments that define one's life. Now, I consider myself just an average bloke who for some odd reason just loves riding my bike, but the entire experience has altered my outlook on life and made me realize how quickly things can change. Since I have returned to my parents house, I have run into so many people who have heard my story and have sent their condolences. Many of these people I have not seen in years or do not know at all. All the thoughts and prayers from everyone have really aided in the recovery.

Now, I am a pretty stubborn person. I probably push myself and deny pain longer than I should but its just difficult for me to accept that i am injured. On Tuesday this week, I ran errands with my mom and sister. I was on my feet for a couple of hours but managed to do the majority of the walking around without the crutch. Although, i was a very slow walker, which might be a welcome change for some who have walked with me b/c I typically walk fast b/c of my long stride, I felt so proud of leaving the crutch. I definitely paid for my adventure yesterday with a very sore pelvis that really limited my mobility. Today is much better. I think I am going to trade the crutch in for a cane. Should make me look a little more GQ. I have been experiencing a lot of numbness in my right arm from the crutch which is not good when that is your good arm.

Part of me is still in deep denial of the entire event. I never considered myself someone that has experienced any traumatic injury but when I look at it from the outside, it was incredibly traumatic. I was hit by a truck, knocked unconscious, and flown to a hospital by helicopter for 6 days and left with 7 fractures including a broken vertebrae in my neck. It would be easy to ride the dependency train, but I dont' consider my injuries serious. Again, my denial checking in. But when i look at the problems faced by other people or the stuff I saw at the hospital, you realize that there is always someone worse off than you. I think if all the complainers in the world would take a minute and realize what they have and realize that there is someone else in worse shape, we, as humans, could heal and make the world a better place. The everyday issues we all face are so insignificant that our narrow-mindedness gets in the way of the true problems facing us. Two days ago, the Fed left the interest rates set at 5.25%. Now, who does that really affect? Yet, the news analysis plasters the print and airwaves. I am on a little soapbox now, but my experience has really opened up a whole new view of life for me so if you are getting exhausted stop reading but I would suggest you not =)

The mining accident in Utah is a major tragedy but if you have followed any of the verbiage from the company CEO you have to be totally exhausted with his words. Instead of talking about how hard they are working to save those minor's lives and how their company will stand by those families, the guy goes into discussing how important coal is for the American economy. I have never seen a person dig themselves so deep and continue to dig a hole of shame without anyone stepping forward to stop him. Now, we all say stuff we dont' always mean when under stress but stressing the importance of the economy over the lives of the minors is so far off base and ridiculous, i would be looking as a worker or shareholder of the company to fire the entire executive committee and put into place a group of individuals who value human life over satisfying some financial bottom line.

Okay, so enough side-commentary from me. But this is my blog and I can write what I want =)

Good news out of New York, Diana returned home on Tuesday. She is recovering at home. She is facing the same problems I did of getting in and out of bed and just getting around but I am so proud of her accomplishments. I know she will continue to improve and gain strength over the coming weeks. A month ago, we were racing in the French Alps on bikes, now we are both hobbling around the house. So quickly things can change, but I said earlier, its the difficult times that define one's life. So I expect us both to make full recoveries and hopefully we provide inspiration to others or do something that brings a positive out of this experience.

The more time that has gone by, I realize this is my 2nd chance, a clean slate if you will. I so dearly want to get back on the bike but I know I have to wait. My motivation is so high right now to see what I can accomplish on the bike. I'm already preparing myself for the hardest fall and winter training I have ever experienced. Fortunately, I enjoy the training, often even more than the actual competition. The biggest competition we face is always with ourselves, which I think attracts me to cycling more than any other sport. I have experienced moments have pure exhaustion and humiliation as well as moments of great performance. All are remembered and enjoyed because mistakes I think are the best education. Case in point, Cascade Classic Stage 4. Never have I in my riding did I ride so poorly. But after I got over the fact on the first lap that it just wasn't my day, I rode the rest of the 48mi with more enthusiasm and pride than in some of my best races. A watershed moment in my cycling career, to steal a word from an old econ professor of mine.

Being off the bike also has made me think about what i can do thats more than just pedalling yet still impact cycling. Now, the idea is still very high level, but I want to use my experience and put it to good use by starting some non-profit, trust, etc that emphasizes co-existence on the streets with autos and bikes. The primary focus would be helping cyclists who are injured and need financial and legal assistance, or just simply a venue for people to discuss their accident or experience with others. Now this seems very benevolent or utopian, but I think it would be valuable. I always wonder how these orgs start out but its just people who have an experience and want to help others. I don't expect to change the world, but if I can help one person get the care they need after a cycling accident then i think thats an accomplishment. Of course this gets me thinking really big, b/c its either go big or go home. So I would have this non-profit and have affiliations with cycling advocacy groups and host rides and events to raise money and more importantly awareness of this great sport. I never thought the places cycling would take me, but in my short time as a "cyclist" I have been all over the country and outside the country. As Einstein described it, the bicycle is the greatest invention.

I know I will have plenty of time over the coming months and years to work on my idea but I want everyone who reads this to think be aware of it, but I hope that I will find the continued support from each of you.

So go open that garage, dust off that frame, pump those tires, and go for a bike ride. Whether its around the block or around a country, it will surprise you at the pleasure you receive from such a simple activity. And if you don't enjoy it, just go riding b/c I can't! for atleast another 3 weeks =)

Cheers,
Matthew

Trucks & Bikes Part Deux

Sorry to leave everyone on the edge, but you know I am kind of an edgy guy =)

Okay, so after going endless rounds of q&a with the overeager med students, I finally made my way to the CT Scan and the XRay. Xrays are pretty straightforward and quick, but CTs are painfully slow and require you to remain absolutely still while you are under this plastic dome. Afterwards, I was probed with xrays and other electro-nuclear-whatever waves, I was wheeled back to the hallway. I guess they ran out of room, b/c I was abadoned in the hallway and left laying on the hardboard, which was incredibly uncomfortable. throughout the whole first 4 days, my back was in incredible spasm. The only relief I could get was by bending my legs which helped aleviate the stress on the back, not ideal but it was my first grade solution to the problem.

A little later, I was wheeled back into the ER. The residents now were pouring in with some serious questions for me. Up to this point, i had only pain in my left shoulder and left pelvis. I thought that was it, but it would soon get a little more serious. The orthopedic resident questioned me if I had any pain in my neck. I said I didn't, then he started feeling on the lower part of my neck and found a definitie tender spot. I told him it hurt and he told me, well it should because you have a crack in your vertebrae. Okay, so things are getting a little serious now. Now the focus was making sure I had movement in my legs and good strength. Through a miracle, movement in my arms, legs and feet were perfect. Maybe it was all the cycling that gave me strong legs =) So now I have a fracture(s) in my: C7 vertebrae, T4 process, T5 process, left scapula, and 3 in my left pelvis. B/c of the inability for the left hand to inform the right hand of what was going on in the Westchester Medical Center, the medical people never gave me a final count of my injuries until Tuesday morning, 5 days after being hit. Pretty ridiculous.

The first night was pretty awful. I made my way to my room. I had a nurse call button but apparently it doesn't seem to work to well with the nightshift. My meds were wearing off, and pain in my back was getting worse. It eventually took the nurses about 35min to respond to my calls after finally losing it and yelling. At this point pain had gone from the level 6 to level 10. My back was in awful shape and I couldn't do anything to get rid of it. Finally they arrived I let them have it. Got a muscle relaxer which helped but i was so angered by the response time.

The next day, the pain was pretty bad but i was learing to deal with the circumstances a little bit better. This is where my motivation to start helping myself starts. When the nurses weren't around, I snuck in a few turns on my side which offered incredible relief to my back. When I told the nurses what I did. I told them in spite and with sarcasm like a little kid that broke the rules and not admitting it just to prove he could do whatever he wanted. Small battles in life i guess =) Finally, I sweet talked one nurse into helping me turn over for a few minutes. I like to think it was my good looks and soft voice but it was probably more sympathy, but for all records we will go with the former. So for the first 4 days my view was the ceiling and nothing else. I begged one nurse to move my bed under the tv so the angle was good enough for me to view. This nurse was stubborn and couldn't quite grasp the idea of just moving my entire bed, not changing the angle at all. But she was completely against it. Unbelievable. So you you talk to a less suspecting nurse and you coerce them to raise your bed to an angle that allows some tv viewing. At this point, any distraction besides the guy next to me in the room is good enough.

I won't go into details over days 2-5 because it just seems that the days never ended and I never had a clock so there was no concept of time. Basically every day was the same, no answers from the doctors, endless checking of vital signs and the food people asking what I wanted to eat, which was nothing. Every day this woman would ask what I wanted for lunch and dinner. Since I was on a no food/liquid diet it was pretty easy. For the record, i didn't have a sip of water from thursday's ride till monday afternoon. Its one way to lose weight an increase that power to weight ratio on the bike, but probably not the healthiest. Once i could eat, all i wanted was fruit. the narcotics make you incredibly naseauous and laying in bed all day doesn't really do much for your metabolism. But they couldn't even do a plate of fruit for me. I asked strictly for nothing but fruit and yogurt. And I received hambugers, french fries, and weird chicken stuff. What is the deal?! Breakfast consisted of a little oatmeal and some fruit. I figure I lost 5-6lbs.

On Monday, day 5 I made my first steps. Kind of monumental, like a babies first steps. The night before I had sat up in my bed b/c I was fed up with laying flat. I told the nurses the next day and they weren't too happy with me but they were curious how I did it. I just told them I sat myself up and it felt great! Again, small battle wins. It also helped to have a lot of good core strength, so everyone should be doing their swiss ball core exercises =) The first steps were pretty difficult. I had never used a crutch before. now i'm pretty pro but the beginning was a little bit of learning. The goal was to walk a little bit. i talked the nurse into allowing me to walk across to diana's room which was about 30ft directly across the hallway. I had to stop 3/4 of the way and sit down in a chair b/c I thought I was going to black out. Once I regained my wit, I pursued on my quest to see diana. I finally made it and told the nurse I was going to stay here and he can come and get me later. I'm usually one to ask for permission but by this time in the hospital I was directing and telling the staff what I was going to do. Stubborness that would come to light later in my recovery. It felt so empowering to be able to walk again. This was the first time I was able to see Diana since we left each other at the scene. I was so happy to see her and we just sat and talked for the next hour. It was good for both of us b/c the experience we shared was so intense that no one else seemed to be able to fully connect to it.

The next day, my ambitions got bigger. So that means walking more. After the nurses left and my family left for some food I snuck out of my room to Diana's room. I think i was there for 2 or more hours. No one could find me. It was quite funny b/c the nurses were not too happy. They were looking to give me a sponge bath but my brother was the only one they could find. Finally i was spotted and I told them I won't be taking a bath this evening. I felt pretty dictator like =)

Wed, day 6 was another day of testing and walking. I learned how to walk up and down steps which can be a little tricky with a single crutch. I passed with flying colors then told my pt person that I was done and was going to see my friend. They were a little baffled. After some high power negotiations by my mom, I was freed later that night. Now when one is released, you would expect to see the doctor at some point. I never saw my neuro guy and didn't see my orthopedic guy until the last minutes. Every day was full of misinformation and little info about what what going to happen and what my condition was. So if you have the chance, avoid Westchester Medical Center. It was pretty ridiculous the information sharing in the hospital and connection i had with the people. There were a few great nurses but overall the experience and care was pretty subpar. As my friend alyssa and I would say about restaurant service, it will be reflected in the tip. unfortunately, there isn't a tipping mechanism in place.

Today, is 12 days post impact. My pelvis is still bothering me but my speed of getting up and down out of seats is pretty fast now. I am making my way around pretty good, slow but I am getting around. Left shoulder is still no dice. My range of movement is better but I am still bound to one arm. I can shower myself now but still relying on my dad to give me a shave b/c of the neck brace. Today, I tied my shoes and put my socks on all by myself in my fastest time ever. Pretty psyched about it. I am planning on flying back to SF on Wed. Pretty confident I can do it. My body is responding very quickly which has impressed my parents. Being in good shape helps, but I'm also pretty stubborn so I keep forcing myself to do everything. I'm down to 2 pain meds a day which is good.

The kicker of the whole being hit thing was that when I landed in the ditch on 94 Turnpike, I landed in a patch of poison ivy and proceeded to lay in it for the next 30min or so. 3 days later, I have 85% of my body covered in itchiness. the b******* at the hospital were oblivous to the red bumps. their solution was to give me 25mg of benadryl, which is what you give to a baby to make it sleep,not a 160lbs guy with ridiculous poison ivy. So it continued to get worse. The leg inflators they put on my calfs to prevent blood clots caused capillary damage and combined with the ivy to leave these scary, disgusting red marks that covered 80% of my lower leg. Its getting better now but left many onlookers in the airport wondering should they feel bad for my crutch and neckbrace or my ugly legs.

well, I will post more later about how I am doing, but please keep diana in your thoughts and prayers. She went through a very painful surgery on friday to fuse 3 vertebrae. Not to mention she is nearing 12 days in the hospital. We will both get through this trying time, but the response we have received from friends and family has been wonderful. Its definitely sped up my recovery.

Cheers,
Matthew

Trucks and Bikes

Since my last post, its been quite an interesting period of time in my life. I set out on Wed, Jul 25 on a redeye aboard jetblue from SFO to JFK. I arrived at JFK just before 9am. The plan was to visit Diana and enjoy some riding and fun in NY/NJ. This was my first time in NY aside from driving through when I was 10. Diana and I had nice pasta lunch at her house then lounged before setting out on an easy training ride. Ride started out good and I was quickly surprised by the length of all the hills around her house. Riding was really nice. The plan was to do about 3 hours then head back for a nice dinner, relaxation and a little vino. One road Diana took me on was atleast 22+% for about 3/4 of amile. It was incredible steep but was fun. Legs were burning at the top. At about 10km from our ride ending, tragedy struck. What happened is entirely based upon the truck driver's memory b/c neither Diana or I remember anything. I am still unable to remember 10min before it all happened.
As we were riding along the road, a pickup truck ran into us and struck me on the back with the rearview mirror. I was catapulted into a rocky ditch alongside the road. I am not sure how long I was unconsciencous but I am sure it was for atleast a few minutes. When I finally came, I awoke to darkness and the intense urging to try to move my arms and breath but I was unable. This is where I think I was most scared. In my head, I was hoping that Diana had slowed down and was coming back to help me. Not knowing that she was down as well. Finally after what seemed to be 15-20seconds of my inability to move and breath, my eyes opened and I was finally able to get some oxygen and move my arms. The only words I could make out were moans. I couldn't see anyone. I knew I had to get back to the side of the road, so I gathered all the strength I had and picked myself up and hobbled the 5-7ft out of the ditch, only to collapse on the ground in exhaustion with intense pain along my left side and the inability to move my left leg and left arm. I finally saw Diana and she was laying down and trying to breath but was experiencing great difficulty. By this point several people had stopped to help. I was yelling at people to tend to her b/c i couldn't get over to her to help. Never in my life had I felt so helpless. Anger was sitting in b/c I couldn't get to her and no one was responding to her at the rate I wanted them.

Now we had several people on the scene helping and we were both being cared for. Shortly later, several ambulances arrived and EMTs came to our help. I only remember a few people on the scene who helped, the bmw store salesman who was with me and guy on a cell phone, and the emt people. The cops finally showed and were busy securing the scene and trying to get information from me. Diana was in much worse shape than I was. Fortunately, I was able to give the officer information for both of us. The EMTs rolled us by into the ambulances only to drive us shortly down the road to the LZ. We had two birds on the way to fly us out. They weren't giving us much information on where we were going or whether we would be going to the same hospital. I kept asking but no one would give me an answer. So at this point, I am waiting on my bird as Diana had just taken off and I was on state highway 94 in NY and that is all I knew where we were. I just arrived 7 hours ago(impact at 4pm) and in a place I had never been before. I tried to keep things light and joking as much as I could. Its always been my way to deal with pain. Partly, I was probably scared of the seriousness of the sitaution. Upon touchdown of my bird I was loaded in and had an IV started. it was an 18min flight. This was my first time in a helicopter, hopefully my next one will be a little more enjoyable and I can actually get a chance to see the skyline as I was forced to look at the ceiling the entire ride.

We finally arrived at Westchester Medical Center and I was quickly rushed to the ER. The pain at this point was incredibly intense and my back was killing me b/c I was forced to lay on a stiff board and the cramps in my back were really getting to me. I found out Diana was at the same hospital but I wouldn't see her for another few hours. At this point, I don't remember as many details. Basically i was rushed between different medical students and doctors asking what my symptoms were over an over.

tbc...

C-Day + 7

For you all who didn't catch the WWII era lingo, the title means Crash Day + 7. Feeling much better this Friday than I did last Friday. Of course it not too difficult to find a more pleasurably day when you are comparing eating asphalt at 27+mph. I took off Monday and Tuesday from riding namely because I came down with a cold on Sunday. I have a feeling that it started before Sunday, but Sunday's give everything and leave nothing on the table type of ride sent my immune system down the river so to speak. I went for a nice 2 hour ride to Mill Valley on Wed under my coach's strict rules of easy spinning. Getting on the bike Wed afternoon felt weird. I was so eager to go riding but the body felt weird getting on the bike. I would think that I would be so use to it after all the kms I have ridden this year. But good sensations in the legs came around. Some moto rider pulled up to me in Mill Valley and kept staring at me. I was quite perplexed then he flipped up his visor and tried to get me to go faster. I looked and smiled. Not today pal...Thursday was another good day on the bike. Went for 3.5 hours on Paradise and out to San Anselmo. Legs felt good in the beginning but I was pretty hungry by the end. Should have brought some food with me. Rode to work today and did some shopping at the Parkside Market which by the way has the best fruit and produce anywhere I have found in the city. Prices are excellent too. I highly recommend jumping in on the yellow peaches and fresh nectarines. They are both in season now and are excellent!

I have been following Le Tour via the live text feed on VeloNews.com b/c I am without cable. Not too much exciting going on but it was sad to hear Dave Zabriskie drop out. I have always liked his style. Very dry sense of humor. He lost 30min the other day. Reminds me of my 25min loss on the last stage of Cascade. Its reassuring to know that even the most trained athletes can have terrible days. He will be back soon enough as will I. On another note, the GC will see a huge shakeup tomorrow in the TT. Latest news out of the Rasmussen file seems a little sketchy. Former friend and riding partner told VeloNews back in 2002 that Rasmussen asked him to carry a box shoes his flight back to Europe for him. Only the shoebox carried what appeared to be bags of blood. He emptied them in the trash after speaking with a physiology friend to see what exactly they might be. Now Rasmussen has denied any wrongdoing but its not good right now for his story or cycling. Given the statements were taken back in 2002, i think adds a little more credibility than the he said accusations going on today. I hope its not true for cycling's sake.

Back to non cycling news...Since I finished cascade on Sunday morning, my appetite has just not been there. I have always found it very hard to eat during racing. Mostly b/c I can't put food down very well when i am riding hard, something I will need to work on. But since I finished my appetite has been not very high which is atypical after a multiple days of hard riding. During stage racing, food becomes a means to get through. Its no longer about taste, its about calories and energy. You eat to ride. It becomes a job to a certain degree if you are racing for 3 or more days in a row. Its often a complaint of Tour riders. Eating the same muesli, baguettes and pasta every day gets boring. I haven't had pasta since last Saturday which is quite different for me b/c I typically eat a lot of pasta, mostly b/c I enjoy it. This week I made a nice broccoli-sundried tomato-mozzerellla risotto on thursday and curry couscous on Wed. I hardly ate any of the couscous and was able to bring some to work the next day. But the risotto was the first decent meal i was able to eat in a matthew portion. I have been eating lots of spinach salad this week with fresh veggies and fruit. Tonight I ate a spinach salad with fresh peaches, red bell peppers, cucumbers, gorgonzola and balsamic. And I made some homemade sourdough croutons. See recipe below. I learned how to do it the other night from my german roommate Kristof. It was super tasty. But I also ate a salad for lunch. What is wrong with me?! I do love salads but I was just too exhausted this evening to make the indian curry I was thinking about. Ohh well, something to look forward to tomorrow night.

Try this on your salad next time for that extra bit of taste and culinary fun..

Garlic-Herb Croutons
Heat 1 tbsp of EV Olive Oil over Med-High in a saute pan
Cut a cup full of fresh bread(good baguette, or other tasty bread) into small pieces
Add one clove of crush garlic to oil
After 1 min, toss the bread in the saute pan
Sprinkle fresh basil, oregano, or rosemary or a combo of herbs to your liking over the bread
Pinch of salt and pepper
Toss bread in pan to make sure herbs are evenly distributed
Cook until golden brown
Now lay them on your salad or store them in a closed container in the fridge(probably a 1-2 day life)


Chow,
Matthew

Cascade Classic Reporte Part Deux

Feeling pretty banged up on Saturday morning, my only objective was to start and see where the road takes me. After the initial climb from the ski zone, I was feeling okay. Definitely could feel the pain in my right hip on every pedal stroke but the hardcore purple bandage i was sportin' on my right arm gave me good sensations(euro slang) and sent chills through the peloton. RR was a nice big climb to start then rolling before a 8k climb to a ski resort on the way back, 120km. The race tactics still blew my mind. For all of you who do this in a race, stop! If you want to destroy a field don't do this. What?

Bad RR tactic: Lets go hard up the hill and make everyone suffer then lets slow down at the top so everyone can rest then brake on the descent so it all goes gruppo compacto. Funny, b/c so many of the teams and riders up front thought this was the key to winning. Keep all the nonplayers in the game as long as possible and let the players rest in the shadows.

Good RR tactic: Drill it on the climb if you can climb and put some pressure on the players. When you are nearing the top, continue to tempo it then drill it on the descent. Atleast give yourself a fighting chance to weed out the players from the fallout.

So the road race was pretty uneventful until the last 8km. But then it pretty much stayed together. I was feeling like crap on the climb, and I know I could have hung with the top guys and I managed to only lose 2minutes. They should have done me in much earlier. So many others were in the same boat. We went throught he feed 2x and each time riders would attack after they passed through only to cause enormous chaos and chasing just so the front group could get 1k down the road and slow to a easy spin. WHY!? The genius tactic caused one guy to crash on the 2nd feed. I was pretty vocal among the asshole riders for pulling off such a stunt and one guy condoned it. More on that shmuk later. So they would attack at the feed then they had the balls to say, "pee break." Its 90+ deg and you want to take a pee break? how can they consume that many liquids, thats what puzzled me the most but then nearly the entire peloton stopped. So you stop to pee which can relieve some pain, but you won't slow to get nutritious fluids? Funny how the mind works...

The circuit race on sunday was going to be a pretty tough parcours with little relief from the sun and nothing but rolling and climbing. Feeling like a million dollars in the pre-start, Darren Leva(RoaringMouse) and I decided to just attack like double-6 shooters from the neutral flag down. Steve Holmes(Arete) called us the California mafia. Both of had nothing to lose and I was tired of the kiddie riding of these riders. Racing should be fast and painful. So as soon as the green went up, I drilled it with darren on my wheel. Another rider had the same idea. We strung it out for 6k until the first climb, then it was Game Over. When I hit the climb, my million dollars felt like 1929 Black Monday dollars, and I fell back quick. I tried chasing for the next 5k with the peloton in sight but no dice. All I could do was just laugh b/c I had never had such bad sensations in my legs. As I was approaching the end of the first lap(28km) I came across Shmuk and another rider. I told them to ride one more with me. They declined. Shmuk said, "nope, I am going home, sitting on the couch and watching the Tour." I wasn't eager to race the rest of the 96k by myself, but hearing Shmuk and it gave me more motivation just b/c I didn't want to ever been listed in the same sentence as this jag. Quiting is never an option. So I rode the last 96k by myself, pushed myself further till the brink of complete exhaustion but it was far better than calling it quits and sitting on the couch wondering what if? I ended up passing several other cat 3 riders in my quest of anti-shmuk. Riding 96k of a race from the back gives you a lot of time to think. One thing that kept me going was just the humor of getting dropped so early and the joking I had with the spectators and feeders. It also gave me lots of phototakes b/c the photographers had nothing else to do and I was all alone. But one thing that I kept thinking, and you can use this too was a quote I have posted on my door in my office. Its by Mark Twain. Its probably the most inspiration quote I have ever come across....

"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover."

It has a little sailing reference, but that is my line of work. Nevertheless, its the hardest days on the bike that make or break you. yesterday was my worst and probably my best despite losing 25min on the last stage. Don't ever quit, b/c you don't know what you will happen or what you will learn.

Matthew

Cascade Classic Reporte

Bend is beautiful riding country. I am staying in some sick host housing.

yesterday was the tt and the crit. TT was pretty difficult with a steady climb for the first 7.5mi and a few false flats with lots of wind. I managed to finish 1.32 down on GC. Thought I did better but wasn't 100% yesterday morning. Crit last night was okay....Race started out regular speed but no one would ride aggressively. I was in the front few spots trying to position myself in case something promising came by. A reno rider went off the front after he counterattacked my move. There was a team of 5 and they kept sending one or two riders up and back. Doing a good job of holding me off. Frustration.

Then I was going around this gnarly bend and I laid it right on the asphalt. Pretty gruesome. I was on the front and hit the deck in the upper 20smph. That consequently ended my crit. I was a little dazed but I managed to get back on the bike and got pulled by the officials. I made sure I was still able to start this morning. I was by far the worst victim of the turn which took out quite a few riders over the duration. Lots of cuts and rr on the right side. Still sore this morning so today's stage should be interesting. No promises on anything today but I am going to give it go b/c its a hard climbing stage and I will try to pull back as many minutes on GC as possible. I took some sweet digital photos so I will probably post them on my blog for shits and giggles.

Matthew

Heading North to the Land of Bend

I am heading to the Cascade Classic tomorrow in Bend, OR. Its a 3-day, 4 stage, stage race. Should be pretty good. I am feeling good and looking for a top placement on GC. I have spent the last two days tuning up the legs after a nice 3 day break off the bike. I can't believe how much better I feel this week compared to last...night and day...

Last night I had my uber-cool boss(Charlie) and her fiance(Jesse) over for some comida. I was stressing a little bit b/c I had so much stuff to get taken care of before I left but dinner was a success. I crossed into some unfamilier territory and made a sun-dried tomato risotto with fresh mozzerella and basil. It was pretty outstanding. Charlie and Jesse were impressed with my culinary whit. I figured out how to cook the risotto from an online recipe but I adapted it to my liking. I will share it with you shortly. For greens, I made a nice summer mixed green salad with fresh peaches, nectarines, red bell peppers, cucumbers, gorganzola cheese, and a balsamic vineagrette. It was super tasty too. Great balance of flavors. Next time i would add some toasted crushed walnuts which would just send it into uber awesome state. For desert I had planned to make crepes with fresh fruit, but ran behind scheduled. So we improvised and created a Make Your Own Crepe stand in my kitchen. Needless to say it was a little competitive. But tasty.

Well, I will leave you on that note. Look forward to my recipe postings in the next few days. I will also be posting stage reports so you can see what is going on.

You can also check out the race website at http://www.cascade-classic.org I am in the Cat 3 race so look for me.

Chow,
Matthew