An Unforgettable Year...

If you haven't been paying attention, today marks the one-year anniversary of getting hit by the truck while doing what I love, riding...I must admit that after the first 3 months, time has quickly gone by. But that is not to say that I don't wake up every morning and remember at some point during the day of what could have happened. I do my best to not think that way but to think more positively of what has happened. So much has changed in my life. People ask me about the accident and I always finish up by saying that it was probably one of the greatest moments in my life. You have to understand my point of view. So hear goes...

Before tragedy struck, I didn't realize how good I had it, how easy things were, or how great life can be. I became closer to my family, I stopped letting the small inconveniences of life get in the way, and I learned how to live. In my eyes, living is about never thinking what-if? Never looking back and seeing regret. Never losing sight of what is important. Importance? Well its definitely not fame or fortune. Its going after your dreams despite the challenges, despite the obstacles, despite the nay-sayers, and despite the threat of failure.

In the 4th day of my stay at Westchester Medical Center, I did my best hobbled-walk to the bathroom in the room. Those 10ft were the hardest steps I have ever taken. The strength it took for me to just pull my self up in the bed nearly took everything out of me. But with those steps, I knew that it was going to be alright. Those 10 steps gave me the confidence to know that no matter what life throws at you, human will can overcome.

This morning I lined up in fitting fashion for the Salida RR. Of the races I have done in CO, this is by far the most difficult. Complete attrition. The thoughts of where I was last year and my condition, it looked impossible of even trying to be a competitive athlete again, but human willpower and support from family and friends have made it possible. My legs were heavy. I knew it from the neutral roll out that it was going to be a day of suffering. On the first climb I hung as best i could but got dropped. I ended up catching back up for the second lap only to get dropped again. The rest of the race I was moving through different chase groups only to be eternally dropped on the last lap. For some reason, i couldn't keep any speed on the descents despite no braking. So the last lap was "matthew time." I had my own personal suffer gruppetto. I saw many bow out in the race early. This attitude sucks. You don't get better by abandoning unless you are injured. Cycling is incredibly hard and painful. In no other sport that I know is it more true of the person with the highest tolerance for pain come out ahead more often. For me, my end result was not something to write about, but when I get into that pain cave next race, next week, next month, or next year, I will have this experience to pull from. Becoming a great cyclist is more than just winning races or training with intervals. Its about training your mind and your body to push itself to limits that you didn't think existed. So next time, you see a cycling race, or read about a race, understand that great cyclists are born, they go through years of pain and discipline to get that rare chance to come across the line with arms in the air.

tomorrow is the criterium. It will be a nice cap off to the weekend. I've been getting some nice high altitude training in. As my hotel at Monarch Ski Mountain is at 9700' and the race is at 7500-8700'. Blood doping the natural way =) Tuesday I head back to the motherland of Tenn, so if I have any readers in TN be sure to get in touch.

I will leave you with this...Next time, you are annoyed by a traffic jam, or by a wait in line at a restaurant or a small squabble b/w friends/family, remember that is probably not worth the frustration. Life is hard enough =)

Ciao,
matthew